Productivity - Sarah Poet

Part 4: I have no idea what I’m doing.

I don’t know exactly what I’m doing. Because I’m not here to regurgitate existing options, most of which (all of which) were designed in patriarchy.

I’ve heard over and over from various sources that when you really get close to something, it feels like nothing makes sense and it’s all going to fall apart. I’ve heard that when it’s about to all come together is when most people tear it down.

I have no idea if things are coming together.

I have, in my life, worked for things to watch them fail. I have given my all to things that did not become financially viable. I have poured love into relationships that did not pay off.

I likely also have pulled out just before things were about to get good. I’ve watched myself almost sabotage things in the very recent past, with enough self awareness now to know when to zip it lest I destroy something viable.

I have some wild ideas. This past week, I was interviewed on my friend Laura McCann’s show called “People We Adore” because Laura recognizes that I have some pretty new ideas. And what I appreciate about her reflection of me and my ideas is that she reflects to me things like, “You’re living it. You’re living on the edge. You’re living the experiment you believe in.”

Thanks for noticing, Laura.

It’s true – I’ve done pretty wild things like left a stable career when my son was in the 4th grade and then sold our home to free myself from karmic shadow-masculine contracts. On and on. I have lived the Sacred Remembering path and my life doesn’t even make sense anymore by conventional standards (some things are a little difficult to justify to my ex-husband, for example, as I take my child with me on this journey.)

Recently, I dissolved my LLC, started a Ministry, moved to community, got a bit of a job after five years as an entrepreneur to put some stability under my ass, and am turning my membership into a space of regenerative prosperity for all women involved. I could have kept building an “empire” but it started to feel shitty and lonely. Did I pull out before it got good? Or did I know it wasn’t the way? Hmm…. maybe both? Maybe who knows? Maybe who cares!

Let’s start with… I dissolved my LLC.

So, LLC is a legal structure and essentially a taxable entity, and one option on a standard menu when one wants to “go into business.” Well, we as sovereign, questioning and discerning women might start to ask ourselves questions like, “Why if I want to do my soul’s work in the world, do I need to do it under a prescribed legal structure?” “Why, in said legal structure, is it actually harder to accrue resources? Why am I participating in something that makes it more difficult to redistribute money directly to women?” (Because that’s not what it was established to do, of course.)

When one starts to ask, “How can I become the most sovereign with all of my resources?” then one receives innovative answers.

Having an LLC didn’t feel good after I built it and looked around me. It was another way that I’d bought into patriarchal structures that, seems to me, didn’t actually serve me or regenerative economics. So, no thank you. My mission is my mission and doesn’t belong to a predetermined legal structure and I don’t need permission from a Big Daddy agency in order to run it. Bye!

Secondly… A Ministry…

This one gets really fun in Part 5, just wait. But here I’ll say – if my work is not through my ego (part 2) and my work is my mission (it is) then my work is service. It is not a business, it is not for profit, it is not something to be mandated by anyone other than Source. My soul’s work and mission is via my own sovereign energy and that of Creator, and it is through this co-creative relationship that the magic and miracles of the work and influence will come about. So THAT is where I want my energy, money, time, attention, resources, and talent to go. I do not consent to agencies siphoning off of my energy while I’m trying to do my soul’s work, thank you very much.

This Ministry is about our sovereign connection with Source, with this planet, and is held in the unified field, where your energy will naturally organize. This Ministry is about each woman’s sovereignty, and for each woman to learn to foster and trust her sovereignty and direct connection with the divine. This Ministry is a strong antidote to separation messaging and is a path to reunification with the Sacred, with Source, with the Soul. Women, standing in the truth of who they are – resourced AF with SOURCE.

Thirdly… A Membership Community aka Sacred Remembering (Church)…

Here’s where I’m really following my intuition to (hopefully) create an actual space where the Heartland regenerative energetics are thriving and women are becoming MORE financially resourced. I sense an entirely new energetic structure of regeneration and replenishment coming for everyone involved. I’m still receiving the specifics (you know, from Source), and more and more come to me the more I commit.

For any one woman to create an empire, and have other women following her, could become a little schemy and also it’s an old method of hyper-individualism that breeds competition. Blech. I didn’t really set out to have to “sell myself” as an entrepreneur, but that’s what that style of solo entrepreneurship requires. It’s constant. It is so much pressure to keep producing even when one feels lonely or downtrodden (and in that model, it’s not even okay to admit that). So I grew up a bit.

I want to receive money for my sacred work. I also want my friends to receive money for their sacred work. I want to pay women who I know to help bring the sacred work into the world. I want women to get paid rightfully for their energy. I want to have enough and share more. I want to create a network of women that all benefit when one woman benefits. These are New Earth energetics, these are regenerative ideas, and it is rightful. So I want to figure out a way that this happens. Together, in Heartland Ministries and the Sacred Remembering Community, I believe that we will figure this out.

I don’t know exactly what I’m doing. Because I’m not here to regurgitate existing options, most of which (all of which) were designed in patriarchy.

Fffffffff that. No.

I am here to help establish new paradigms. With my life. With my energy, heart, body and resources. Only that will do.

A few years ago, feeling timid yet much more determined and courageous than I am even now, I was standing in the kitchen of the house I ended up selling and I thought, “Well, fuck. It’s as though my soul is guiding me such that I can’t even participate in anything patriarchal anymore. It just doesn’t even work.” Yes, dear past-Sarah, you nailed it. That was and is exactly the case.

I’m a rebel and I don’t necessarily even mean to be anymore. It’s just who I am. It’s messy, especially when I let the human ego get loud in my head with notions of failure or scarcity. I think the difference is, I’m no longer naive. I’m aware that patriarchy and sexism and separation exist everywhere everyday and just because I say “no” to it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect my life and the lives of those I love.

In fact, the fact that I’ve said “no” to it with my life and it still exists has, in the past, made my life much harder. Complacency is easy. Actually figuring out how to be sovereign in your energy such that you can’t be siphoned from, and also, such that you don’t feel like you just walked through a battlefield every dang day is significant work. Thankfully, I am “getting it” and it’s getting easier.

Sovereignty isn’t about fighting or defending. It’s about discerning and owning the fuck out of what you give your energy to and what you don’t. When women do that, it changes the world.

My job is to live as often and as many moments as I can in what I call “The Heartland” – the space of the Regenerative Feminine. Because when I live it, and teach others how to feel and hold the frequencies, we transcend patriarchy.

Boom.

You know, I think this might be the point of the breakthrough. I have a pretty good feeling about it. But if not, if you’ve known me for any time at all, you know I’ll keep going.

PS:

I do want to say thank you – to the women who see me NOT succeeding in so many (traditional) ways and who hear my worries and who still sit beside me, join my ministry board of trustees, make altars on my behalf, and believe in me when I crash. Thank you for continuing to come to the Sacred Remembering calls, for referring your friends, for trusting me to caretake your partnerships and your children. I love you. Let’s do this. Let’s get paid well and make new models. I can’t do it without you and don’t want to. The New Earth is here and we are it.

If you’d like to join the waitlist for Heartland 2023, it is now open HERE.

https://www.sarahpoet.com/heartland

The real gender issues at work won’t look like gender issues.

So if companies are willing to innovate, and willing to realize, like we do in #DEI, that everyone has a bias, then we can start to talk about masculine and feminine characteristics and behaviors – not genders, we pivot the gender conversation – and take the conversation and #awareness to a whole new level.

The real gender issues at work won’t look like gender issues.

There are gender issues, because these are the times we’re living in, but someone’s found a way to justify decisions, to quote the data, and prove that all of the boxes have been checked – in order to put a lot of energy into holding up a pronouncement that “There are no gender issues going on here!”

You will know that there are #gender issues at work when you look at the rate of true #satisfaction of the people, especially the #women and gender non-conforming people.

We are still in an age where a lot of adult white males are busy leading #hierarchies, checking boxes, and saying, “We do not have a problem here.” This is more than we’d like to think, and it’s happening for understandable reasons, like our culture pressured men to feel they could always have the answers, and handle any problem.

There are also a lot of men emerging that want to do it differently, namely younger men and men who have gone through psycho-spiritual awakenings.

If the true essence about the feeling at work is not a good one, for anyone, you have a gender issue.

And no amount of checking #HR boxes is going to “solve” this. No amount of #denial and hierarchical proclamation will white wash the situation. It’s very easy at this point for people to see through that. They probably try to speak to it, and when they’re ignored, or it is explained to them how they are wrong, they often quit, if they’re not gotten rid of first.

Handling this requires a new and different approach – one that is relational and innovative. It requires companies who actually want to lead progress to get real about the unspoken or undefined gender issues.

Going to layer deeper, gender issues are, at the root, a discrimination of #feminine energy. Because if a woman uses #masculine #energy at work, she’s actually rewarded and can get by quite alright. This is how women were historically able to win positions of power – by adopting masculine work traits. The other polarity that women experience in the workplace is to stay quiet and more docile to keep the job. Both of these are ways that women behave in a #patriarchal workforce, both of which women are growing tired of and is why you see them #quitting .

Culturally, we don’t have the words for it yet – but we want to be able to bring the archetypal feminine to work.

I was recently talking with a male client of mine who has a multi-million dollar business. He told me that he recognized that to hire women put his business at a competitive #advantage. Not only does he hire them, he knows that to genuinely listen to them, to let them share their wisdom, and come up with a new ideas, is the reason his business is outshining competitors.

He acknowledged that he sees the resistance in others to listening to women, and it is costing his competitors. Hiring innovative women, and him getting behind their ideas, has taken his business to a whole new level.

Because he understands a bit about masculine and feminine through our work together, he was able to see that the competitive advantage was feminine energy, which is inherently creational, intuitive, and relational.

This is what the traditional workplace has been missing. And it is the very thing that some companies are denying the need to look at, while other companies are pulling ahead because they’re not just putting women into positions of influence, but then they are allowing the entire body of wisdom – intuition and all – within that woman to influence decision making in the company.

Wow! Of COURSE this is where our world should be progressing right now. Why all the discomfort and resistance?? We have to let go of what is not working to advance to where the world is progressing.

It’s going that direction, and companies can innovate with feminine / masculine understanding and incorporation for #holistic development – or not, and be left behind.

My client was happy to watch his company be more successful, and his clients more happy because of the magic that these women brought. He is someone willing to innovate and get out of his own way. Are you?

For workplace consultations, leadership team development, and systems consulting, see www . SarahPoet . com / Reconciliation and book a call today.

Know someone who needs to see this? Thanks for sharing.

#genderequity #masculinefeminine #leadership #innovation #consulting #deiconsultant #hrinnovations #newparadigm #business #thoughtleadership

The real reason women are quitting.

I found it was becoming more and more difficult, as I was a part of a team and physical community of people, to remain sovereign particularly in my emotional energy. When we are relational (and we naturally are), the human-relating stuff starts to seep into the crevices of our lives, and work isn’t just work – it’s intertwined and perhaps harder to compartmentalize.

As a woman, I watch myself have a certain habit that goes something like this: when I am invited to be a part of a thing (job, relationship, group goal), I first discern if it is aligned with my values and life direction, and then if it seems to be, I jump right in and give it my all. Key word – discern. I remember an old friend saying to me years ago after a breakup, “I think it’s all about discernment, Sarah.” She was saying – think more about it first. So I have gotten better over the years, but still, oftentimes, not long after this wholehearted “yes” to investing my time, energy, attention and heart into the genuine progress of said job, relationship or group goal, there is often a subsequent time of saying to myself, “Ah shit, I gave too much again.”

What would indicate that I gave too much as a woman? Personally, and I don’t think I’m alone, I experience that I’m not being met by others in the amount of care that I am putting into it. It might seem like I’m caring too much, or they don’t care as much as I do. Another way I experience this is when the value exchange isn’t reciprocal. Maybe I gave too much in a job contract and am finding myself thinking about it when I’m not technically working, taking me away from valuable family or creative time. Or, the last time I was in a love relationship I knew I’d given it too much of my attention (and other resources) when I became sick with covid and he said as if accidentally speaking out loud the passing thought that was going through his head, “Oh, I should bring you food.” And then he never showed up with the food nor mentioned it again. That was the moment I thought, “Oops, I’ve invested more than he’s willing to invest.” It all fell apart not long after, which is quite alright, because I don’t like to live in a net deficit. I desire reciprocity and mutual respect of one another’s resources in places where I invest my energy.

Emotional Over-giving:

But back to the “thinking about the job when I’m not technically working.” This one wasn’t a problem when I was solely running my own business. After a previous career in education and as a school leader, I’d worked to build my own coaching and consulting practice in masculine / feminine energetics (see my TEDx) but then for various reasons – including but not limited to desiring to live and serve within a progressive community, and wanting to raise my son with more stability and positive community influence – I negotiated a part time salary to help build an innovative new project. I got my first “job” in nearly six years.

Because we live and learn what we’re meant to teach, over the years I have developed and taught this system to women called Structure and Flow and my entrepreneurial work has begun to take shape more and more around redefining women’s #resources . I have taught this for years, but then I needed to really lean on this system for women’s resource allocation that I’d developed, as I found myself needing to categorize my time and not allow the various jobs and tasks to all blend together.

I’m pretty good at compartmentalizing tasks and duties, or giving my attention and focus to one thing at one time. For example, I am a single mother and devote time to my son in a certain way and when I’m with him, I’m fully with him. I have coaching clients and run a membership community, and again, when it is just my work there is this joy that I have with it and I never think to myself, “I’m thinking about a client too much.” I do my work, my clients reach out when they need me, and all is great in the exchange (which I worked a very long time to achieve, I will say). I’m actually very good at managing my own energy and boundaries when it’s just me and my business, but some kind of old wire tripped when I went back to a paycheck, and what an opportunity to observe and report from this angle!

Personally, I have redefined the value of my resources. People don’t just pay me for my time, as standard economics has implemented for some time. I define my valuable resources as my time, life force energy, attention, creative energy, my love and devotion, my intuition, my body, and my emotional wisdom. And that is what I charge for. Those are the things I’m considering when getting involved in an exchange, but that’s because I’ve literally redefined “value” for myself.

Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself.

She said what? Charging for emotional energy? Yes.

My emotional energy is one of my most valuable resources. It is my intuition, wisdom, my body’s knowing, and emotional energy is the basis of creational energy.

To begin to redefine what “resources” are for us, and then also see the true value of them, we must be willing to look at “resources” and energy, and redefine them through a #masculine / #feminine lens. And when we do, it all starts to make more sense. This is what is underlying women quitting. Stick with me.

Masculine & Feminine Resources are based in Masculine & Feminine Energy:

It’s not a #gender thing, although it influenced #genderstereotypes . Masculine & Feminine are energies within each of us, and we call on them for different aspects of our lives.

I’ll break it down like this – there are feminine and masculine archetypes, and affiliated with those archetypes are certain qualities. Now, we must (must) take time to understand what is an *actual* archetypal quality of both masculine and feminine versus a societal projection of feminine and masculine. Most people, if you just say these words, are going to associate societal projections and stereotypes to this, but I don’t have time to unwind that here, so we’ll move forward with a few quick examples.

An archetype isn’t a person, it’s a flawless example (which people are not). The masculine archetype possesses qualities of singular focus, linear thought, task completion, decisiveness, consideration of all in the tribe, and makes sure everyone has their resources.

You might not associate masculine with those things and instead associate masculine with things like dominance, control, coercion, snagging all the resources, etc. That is patriarchal, or shadow masculine. Also called unconscious masculine. It’s what needs to be cleaned up on the planet.

The feminine archetype in its healthy expression will possess qualities such as nurturance, caretaking, emotional consideration, lovingly willing to open and to give, is very heart centered, has a wisdom based on a full-spectrum seeing (as compared to the singular focus of the masculine), is communal and relational.

The unconscious, shadow, unhealthy feminine would be emotionally manipulative, withholding, seeking to snag the man’s resources, or the harsh feminism of trying to take the power back.

We pay for masculine qualities, but expect the feminine to give for free:

If you hear nothing else from this article, hear this: in value exchanges, both economic and relational, our society as it stands most often will pay for what is valued as masculine energy, and it wants feminine energy for free.

And this is why #women are #quitting – because they are tired of the world just expecting the exhaustion of what is inherently feminine to be normal and for the taking.

When you work in a “job,” you’re typically trading #performance and time for a paycheck. Performance is output, people assume that output leads to profit. All of this is masculine energy also because it’s outward, always moving, always pushing. And if you’re always in “yang,” then you’re not taking enough time to rest, and you’re not going to get to the really good creativity. #Creativity and productivity are not the same thing, they do not at all come from the same areas of the brain or impulse. Creativity has an impulse and needs to be nurtured, production can be rote.

So that means, most companies who are trying to innovate probably want us to feel something. When we can feel, we can be lit up, we can invest our love and devotion, we can care about what we are doing, and we can create better solutions for the world. You’ll notice that what I just referenced is feminine.

But people typically don’t pay for creational downtime, for time to gestate the ideas, to have an emotional reaction to something. Some are innovating in this way, but many are still pushing for productivity and output as a measure of profit, and passing this pressure onto employees.

Women are going to have emotional reactions to work, because we are relational beings and we are always considering the whole. It is the nature of the feminine, and women have feminine energy because we are women, and the world is having a massive awakening in feminine consciousness right now. If you’re missing this, your head is under a patriarchal rock.

This awakening is also an unidentified reason women are quitting. They are #remembering something, and realizing they don’t fit into the status quo, but don’t have the exact words for it. The more a woman remembers the truth of authentic feminine and masculine, the less she will be able to fit into what has been the norm. Thank God. Because she will quit, and she will start something new that does work differently, and she will be on the front lines of innovation.

Redefining value at work to keep women:

We want to care and invest our emotional energy, and many times, it isn’t wanted or appreciated. Correction: it is wanted if someone needs to vent #emotions at work to someone who is naturally empathic. It is wanted for free. But what happens when a woman has an intuition inside of a work project, or wants to bring an innovative agenda item to a meeting, or try something collaboratively that has traditionally been between male decision makers in a room? Can that be heard? Or not? If not, she’ll be quitting.

It is not fun or fair for a feminine-essenced being to have to stuff her #intuition or inner knowing (also called emotional energy) because only masculine traits are valued. It is not fun for her to emotionally labor, on her own time while she’s trying to have an easy going dinner with her kids, how she’s not listened to at work or how she truly senses what is needed, but her wisdom isn’t valued. That is deadening. She has life force, she has energy that she wants to give. She wants to devote it toward something that matters.

Will you redefine “value” in order to keep the women? Will you better listen to the women in your organization? Will you trust her to know the fullness of what she can bring to work, and know that your company will be better off for it? I hope so. When you do, all KINDS of creational energy will flow for your projects! All of that feminine emotional energy remember, is creational, and it wants to go somewhere!

Decision makers are welcome to reach out to me, as I consult with companies to identify and help heal the exact places causing unrest. Many people don’t know how to identify what is blocking the operational systems in an organization because they don’t yet have this language or concept. It’s not taboo to talk openly about masculine and feminine, about where it applies to gender and how it impacts us. Companies who are willing to do this will innovate first and go the farthest in the future world we’re creating. Visit https://www.sarahpoet.com/reconciliation today to learn more and book a consultation with me.

#embodiedbreath #masculinefeminine #quietquitting #greatresignation #emotionallabor #emotionalenergy #creativity #innovation #newparadigm

My “business” failed this year, I’m happy to announce.

Pressuring my mission, this soul of Embodied Breath that came to me in 2017, squeezing and pushing her, always demanding more of her, behaving toward her as the world has treated the feminine – that failed this year.

I’m happy to announce, my “business” failed this year.

False marketing failed this year – pretending I have it all together when I don’t as a “coach” failed. Participating in notions of perfectionism failed. It is not a strategy that is in alignment with me.

I am happy to announce, over-giving failed this year. I stopped endlessly giving in the hopes that I would receive – clients, attention, money, or validation that what I was giving was worth it to anyone. Business built on giving in the hopes of receiving failed this year.

Trying to figure out what you wanted to hear or receive, so that I could give it, failed this year.

Getting in front of the camera or making a social media post because some formula says I’m supposed to failed this year.

Holding up more than is mine to hold up failed this year, so that other beautiful realities of how the feminine is meant to be supported could be realized and energetically restructured.

Self-sacrifice failed this year.

Emulating patriarchal, extractive business techniques that tell us that we as female entrepreneurs can “have it all!” as a one-woman show, which forces us to sell sell sell and build build build, and inherently manipulate our potential clients – that also failed this year.

Hiring business coaches to tell me how to run an inherently patriarchal business, when I could and potentially should be sharing my realizations with them, failed this year. Overlooking the inherent feminine trauma inside of this coaching “industry” while so many attempt to do it differently but are silently finding out it doesn’t work if you want to actually do it differently – that failed this year.

Participation in that which does not align with my values failed this year.

What I thought was “business” thankfully failed this year.

Assuming that if I played by the rules and legal structures laid out as options for me and other female entrepreneurs that I would be supported and successful in an inherently patriarchal culture failed this year.

Anything that is not energetically sovereign failed this year. Giving away my resources failed for me this year.

Selling myself failed this year. It’s not me or “female entrepreneurship” or talent, resume, or title that I’m selling. It’s love that I’m offering, and love that I am exchanging, because it is love that I am being, and it is love that I serve.

Love didn’t fail this year. Love was birthed this year, from what has honestly been a perpetually tender heart. Love rose as my “why” this year. And from that, trust began to thrive this year.

Connection didn’t fail. Nor did authenticity or the willingness to sit with you in the very real spaces. In fact, the most real of the real are the only spaces I will now enter, when the invitations come to invite me there.

The devotion to creating the new paradigm we need – that is thriving this year.

The need on this Earth for what Embodied Breath and I have co-created over these last four years didn’t fail – it’s alive and well. And so all of these other things failed so that I could get it in my little human head that “business” isn’t what it’s ever been about.

It’s about the mission – for unity of feminine and masculine on all levels, for the return of the regenerative and prosperous feminine, for the sovereignty of our resources.

It’s not a business, it’s a mission.

And in 2023, this mission is becoming a Ministry.

May we have the heart and wisdom to allow the old structures to fail, so that love can help build a new earth.

May my energy and my life be of service to this re-unified frequency of partnership and love.

Sarah Poet

*I am not going anywhere. This is to announce that foundations & energetic structures are changing within a regenerative frequency of Love.

You can still contact me any time.

Serving Union: https://www.sarahpoet.com/consciousrelating

Serving Women: https://www.sarahpoet.com/privatementorships

Serving Men: https://www.sarahpoet.com/private-coaching-for-men

How you can make feminine leadership more sustainable for women.

Just because women are in positions of leadership does not equate to the return of sustainable feminine leadership or respect for feminine qualities. True feminine leadership happens when we rebalance the inequitability of feminine & masculine in our actions, efforts, and energetics, and ensure the sustainability of systems, including the women themselves.

Last spring, as the new leaves were returning to the trees and the ferns were unfurling, I visited a year-one school startup to consult with the two women who were running it.

The ideas for the school were all about innovation, keeping children close to nature, and preserving the ideals of curiosity, self sovereignty, and relationship. The school was beautifully visioned and the positive response from the community had made for fast growth. And these women leaders were exhausted.

They were working incredibly long hours and the school had not yet met financial goals, which meant that it was running at a deficit. In response, to take care of the children and the vision, they worked harder. Of course they did. It’s what women visionaries do.

They were trying to get it to go, powering through, even despite not getting paid because they were paying the teachers first. And I was there as a school consultant, yes, but also a systems analyst, a women’s leadership guide, and as someone who connects land/vision/people together when there is a mission at work. In other words, I’m looking at systems, including the energetic flow in the system as a whole. Where is it leaking energy? Where is there an area that is out of integrity with the flow of the entire system of the mission?

And so I asked them, “Are you okay running this school if it requires that the school be run on feminine depletion? You are looking at creating a holistic school model, but what of your model is requiring the feminine to continue to run on depleted resources and energy?”

I heard back from them recently, a full half a year later, and the administrator told me, “There is not a day that goes by that I do not ask myself that question. It was the greatest guiding question I’ve received.”

You see, our systems have historically run on feminine depletion.

What do I mean by that? In short, I mean that in a patriarchal way of building and operating, we over-rely on masculine energetics: build, push, create, exert, make happen. And when we stay in that energetic for too long, we create an imbalance, which forces the feminine energetic to go into submission (getting what it can where it can, like 6 hours of sleep, a little exposure, or a little congratulatory high five now and again) or it’s just forgotten about altogether (which we’ve seen in our modern workplaces in the quest for more profit, more wins.)

When the feminine is depleted, we get women who over-give, women with hormonal disorders and weird health symptoms, the pushing down of things like intuition and taking time for an idea to gestate, and the unrealistic expectation that we are able to stay continually in go-mode.

But this of course doesn’t only affect women. It affects men in that they resist vulnerability or not having an answer, always wanting to maintain the image that everything is under control. And it has affected our ideas of leadership across the globe.

You can also begin to deduce from my simple examples here that it is not a gendered issue, and we’d be well served to move beyond the typical conversations of gender in the workplace and include instead these considerations of what healthy and unhealthy feminine and masculine leadership look like, and how they are expressed.

Historically, we’ve made “women’s leadership” and “feminine leadership” synonymous, and I want to state explicitly that they are not. Just because a woman is in a position of leadership does not mean that she is enacting feminine principles in the least. Even to write that, I can imagine that some readers may bristle at the word “feminine” being inserted into a conversation about leadership because the stigma is still that the feminine can’t lead for it’s “softness.”

But I will tell you that when we look at some of the most innovative research and actions taking place in the field of leadership, what is happening is the re-incorporation of the feminine archetype and feminine leadership behaviors. To name a few: shared decision making, collaboration, flexible scheduling, and allowing teams extended periods of time to create. All of these are aspects of feminine leadership whether we call it that or not.

Then why name it? Why name it as feminine or masculine? I strongly believe that in doing so, we can save a lot of time with a conceptual framework that also reduces many of the unspoken and tricky issues that are chalked up to gender in the workplace. It’s not differences in gender that are most important. What is most important is whether or not leaders value and know how to lead, incorporating both feminine and masculine leadership qualities, and whether they extend that to their cultures and teams.

Going back to the two women that I was coaching, as I asked them this question, “Are you okay with this place running on feminine depletion?,” they had already had an understanding of feminine and masculine, and so when I asked it, the real and deeper issue became more clear.

In trying to do the right thing, they were exhausting themselves and also running on exhausted financial resources. We can see that such a situation is unsustainable. And it is in the reconstructing of both the finances and the activities of the school into an equitable feminine / masculine collaboration that both of these issues can be corrected.

A world that didn’t value the feminine was also the world that created a very serious deficit in environmental sustainability. The two go hand in hand and this topic could be elaborated on quite extensively. And so for today, I’ll conclude that feminine leadership, which I would encourage all leaders to embrace regardless of gender, would not allow for the depletion of the feminine energetic, the earth, the resources, or the people. Often in our quest for power and profit, these are the very things that are depleted and overlooked. Women and men, and leaders of all kinds, it’s time for true thriving to include the wellness and sustainability of the feminine and masculine in harmony.

Sarah Poet is available for consultations with leaders of any gender and maintains an eye to the energetic efficiency of systems as we create a more sustainable and equitable world. To schedule, visit www.sarahpoet.com/book.

Spoken & Unspoken Exchange Agreements: Who is getting your energy and why?

Some exchange agreements are laid out clearly, and many others are assumed. Are you clear about who gets your energy & why?

Some exchange agreements are laid out clearly, and many others are assumed.

At the end of a love relationship a few years ago, after I had moved in with this man thinking it was a long term agreement, and then six months later he gave my child and I the boot, we were in a counseling session.

I was speaking about the agreements that we’d had, and the counselor said to me one of the most illuminating things I’d ever heard. He said, “Sarah, were these agreements stated or written, or did you assume them?”

In fact, I had assumed them. Based on his character as I’d known it to be and his invitation to build a life together. But I had assumed that that had meant certain things about the exchange agreements.

Now, I’m not still heartbroken about that in the least, but I was reminded of this while walking and talking with a friend this morning about EXCHANGE AGREEMENTS specifically between men and women.

And I would apply this to the workplace as well.

When I took a job on a leadership team in a startup, I got a massive raise from my previous charter school job. And then I would receive texts when I was putting my child to bed, or after ten PM. When I decided that I would not be answering these texts because they were invasive, I caused some disruption. Nowhere was it written in my contract that I was obligated to answer leadership team texts at 10pm if I was not on call. The unspoken expectation was that I would answer because I’d gotten a good gig. Then it was as if they thought they owned my energy.

They did not own my energy. No one owns my energy but me, even when there is an exchange agreement in place.

For hundreds of generations, the exchange dynamics between men and women were very skewed. A woman couldn’t own land or even have her own last name, and her food and housing security depended on her husband or her father, and she had to keep them happy. So she made certain decisions about her body, who she permitted access to her body, how she gave her energy, and how she specifically did not exert her energy or risk being “too much” in order to preserve her access to resources for her and her children.

Women still carry the TENDENCY to get wrapped up in unspoken, unwritten exchange agreements with men and employers, because we’re subconsciously still wired to expend our energy in order to not piss off the man or authority figure that has control over our resources. If an employer decides whether or not you get a paycheck, and that paycheck feeds your kids, then you will do things like turn down your opinion or answer the text after hours in order to ensure your security.

This happens at every tier of employment, and women who have climbed ladders to achieve more are not immune to this.

And I’ll go on record right now and say that I believe that this is the root cause of burnout. How we use our energy based on what we perceive the unspoken exchange agreements to be is making women more tired, more depleted, and wondering how in the world their quest for leadership did not land them with a life of actual fulfillment.

Where is your energy going? Why? What is actually contracted, or agreed upon, and what isn’t? How is this happening both at work and with your spouse?

When that personal relationship ended, I couldn’t understand why this man wouldn’t have been happy. Because I had tried to keep him happy. He was, after all, inviting my son and I into his house. I’m not too proud to admit it. Of course not. How could I recommend that we take an honest look at these dynamics if I’m not willing to own it myself?

I did, eventually, piss off the employer with the edge that I was walking. I was getting too big for my britches, asking for equity in too many ways, and this was the last job I had before becoming a women’s coach and masculine feminine polarity consultant.

My friend and I this morning talked about the insidious nature of the unspoken exchange agreements between men and women, between money and sex. Who gets access to your energy? Why? Are you trying to keep them happy? Are you happy in this behavior and in your agreements?

Because I’m here to tell you, you are the only one that decides who gets access to your energy, when, and why. Every day, you get to define and redefine your agreements. You get to ask for that. You get to stop the habitual self sacrifice right now.

Now wouldn’t that just be the end to burn out right there?

If you’d like to discuss personal coaching about taking back your energy from unspoken agreements that are depleting your life, contact me by setting up a consultation at www.SarahPoet.com/book.

“Birthing Upward” – Energy dynamics of the creative process are changing.

Feminine & Masculine energetics in new paradigm business will not be top-down, rather, bottom-up.

*Esoteric in nature, you can read this post as an “energy update” and ask yourself how it applies to your creativity, your masculine/feminine relationships, and organizational structure in new-paradigm businesses.*

This week, in my meditations and client sessions, there has been a theme and a common vision – that of “Birthing upward.”

As I tune into this further, this seems to have to do with the way in which we are now optimally creating on the planet, having to do with feminine now leading the masculine.

You can envision this by feeling into the following visuals.

We are accustomed to “birthing downwards” on this planet. The masculine would impart the seed (of consciousness or creation) into the feminine. HE would do the giving (first), that would go into her (second), and then the formation of the creation (ex a human embryo, a business, or any other creation coming into form) would occur (third).

This view could be inherently patriarchal because there is a “top down” assumption. The masculine would impart the seed, wisdom, power, authority, etc, and it would go downward through the process. This is also the energetic of old system hierarchies itself, with an assumed top-down leader, usually male, who makes the decisions for the many and essentially determines the creation. As we know, sadly, this method of authoritative masculine actually stifles true creativity. This is why we are seeing a lot of organizational structures now giving teams time to collaborate on new creations – time to derive the idea and spend in the mess of creativity is actually a feminine energetic resurging.

Now, I will attempt to share with you what I am seeing with “birthing upward.” Please keep in mind that ultimately, masculine and feminine unify as One, and yet, there are some energetics that are actively restructuring as our planetary energies realign and re-harmonize. So I am not saying that “women are taking over” or that the “feminine will win” or anything absurd and polarized like that. But I am noticing a very big “counter” energetic occurring to the polarized world as it has existed, with the masculine initiating the creative process and the formation of the creations.

I see “birthing upward” not as the only way it is ever meant to be, but that this is a “shifting in polarity” so to speak as the earth is in the process of re-harmonizing. So this is likely taking place in the earth grid structure as well as in our human bodies, psyches, relationships, business formations, organizational restructuring, etc.

Birthing upward does not start with the masculine, rather, it starts with the womb. The womb of creation is the infinite space into which the masculine seed of consciousness can be magnetized. We have been preparing Her to actually become the leading energetic source of what will now be created.

Many of us women have been doing a lot of clearing of trauma, dense energy, miasma, patriarchal exchange energetics, and womb hijackings. The feminine has been energetically advancing its sovereignty, in women’s bodies and in the earth grid. The womb energy of the collective is seemingly more clear than it has been in many thousands of years – potentially enough to cause this polarity shift, it would seem.

In a session with two men, a generation younger than myself, who are envisioning a collective and collaborative new business structure that is focused on community, I was intuitively guided to share with them this concept of “birthing upward.” I was also guided (as in, I was channeling & communicating from their soul business creation information to them) to have them tune into the “womb space” on their body first. They were pointed toward acknowledging the presence and intelligence of this energetic center in their own male bodies. This would be required for their new leadership.

There was to be no “top down” leadership, though healthy masculine structure and consciousness were welcome and necessary. But hierarchical power structures were old paradigm and unwelcome, which these young men already realize, but their questions for the session were about what the new structures for organizational development look and feel like. Leadership in a new paradigm of business is an interesting inquiry. Do we let it go and have just shared leadership? Do we not have leaders? Was masculine leadership always wrong?

I think the answer to all of those questions is “no.” Masculine clarity and decision making is necessary for running effective businesses, regardless of the gender expressing it. We also don’t need men to fear their own leadership – and we need more men to be very comfortable in their expressed masculinity and we should never shame men for their attempts at leadership (rather hone the intelligence of it). However, as these young men are realizing, we will be restructuring organizational teams and redefining leadership in the near future to meet the needs of the people and planet – and what I am seeing is that these new ways of “birthing upward” will also be more profitable.

I was guided to share with them that the “fertile soil” of building from the ground up, which included engaging, optimizing, and celebrating the enthusiasm of all participants in the formation of what the leadership would build would be the “birthing upward” approach for the success of their business formation.

Widening the vision again now with etheric metaphor, the womb of all creation is the fertile ground, no longer into which we will plant the seeds, but now, the fertile ground of the cosmic womb of creation (the feminine) will determine which consciousness to attract to it (the seed), thereby activating the birth of certain (new) creations.

The womb is now attracting the seed of its own choosing with a certain magnetism. The cosmic womb (deep, eternal feminine) is now calling to it the light of consciousness (deep, eternal masculine.) From there, and this is the most significant part, the structure is forming. The feminine is magnetizing the consciousness that will lead to new structures. The feminine is attracting the consciousness of its choosing.

The collective will attract its new leaders. The people will determine our next direction. The womb will attract the consciousness – this is “birthing upwards.”

Any person who is able to read and follow this does not see this as a “women flipping the power script” feminist agenda, rather, the delicate and powerful shift in polarity and honestly, an energetic directive, coming from the Holy Mother, and the Holy Father is ready and welcome to participate. The recalibration is in effect.

If you are starting a new business based on a “soul calling” and would like to do a channeled session with the business entity itself, if you are looking at how to redesign leadership structures in your organization to make it more inclusive, or if you just feel the intuitive nudge – schedule a consultation with me at www.sarahpoet.com/book.

Devotion + CoCreation = Receptivity

Long ago, women learned to be productive. We learned to hustle. We learned that our perceived value was tied to how much we got done. And, we learned that we’d have to carry a really big load, and so it was just best to get used to it.

Women often have a difficult time taking time for themselves, or resting, or they end of feeling guilty about choosing to stop when there are still things on the to-do list. Every woman knows this feeling.

A few years ago, I started a “soul-aligned” business. Meaning it is a business of calling, of purpose. In such a business, there is a lot of emotional learning and learning about oneself. You can’t, of course, live your purpose and not have to stand in some fire in preparation for what you’re called to do.

I have spent a lot of time observing the energetics of healthy feminine flow and the masculine action in life and business. I have taught a lot of women about how to redefine and balance these archetypes in their lives. We need both – we can’t just sit around and flow all day, or we wouldn’t actually have a business at all. And, women I see in my practice want to lead their lives and businesses with a healthy masculine, replacing the old, outdated patriarchal hustle.

This is a great idea, but it is hard to do.

I’ve been hearing a lot of women, myself included, redefining “productivity” lately. I like this solution. There’s both healthy and unhealthy aspects to productivity.

I like feeling productive. I like crossing things off the to-do list. I know about my business that if I leave energetics messy – such as not sending invoices or typing clients notes, hence making myself overwhelmed – that the business doesn’t run and money doesn’t come in. So it’s not possible to abandon “doing” altogether, nor do I think any of us really want to. Even if we’re reclaiming the feminine archetype and the inherent right we have to slow down and rest when it’s called for, we don’t want to abandon action.

It’s the quality of the action, the “doing,” that I want to encourage us to look at. This is what I’ve been contemplating lately.

In 2022, a group of us started Structure & Flow, and this energy optimization system asks you to pick words that anchor you to your desire. These words symbolize what you’re focusing on and how you want to feel. These are the “why” for any action we take, so that we are taking aligned action.

My words are devotional, co-creative, receptive.

Essentially, what I want to do daily is to maintain a devotional practice. Inside of that devotional practice, I get insights, excitement, clarity, and motivation. (That’s the feminine, by the way – taking the time to pause and listen.) Devotion often also involves movement for me in an embodied feminine practice. Going to the yoga mat, improvisational dance, candles and sensuality, taking a hike, or being on my meditation cushion. I intend for devotion to be a feminine practice. This is where I am being the muse, opening to hearing the divine, the sacred, the intuition, the soul.

If I create that devotional space, the sacred will meet me there.

And then, from there, I will have insight.

And then I can “do” something with it, which is what I call “co-creation.” If I take action because I get an idea into my little head and then work to make it happen, I am in productivity for productivity’s sake. If I listen to the wisdom that comes from devotional practice, my action becomes co-creation, a much higher quality action.

As an entrepreneur, I have to take action. I actually love action and structure – both inherently masculine qualities. But through trial and error, I know that if I’m in the energy of productivity without devotion, I’m not actually making money. I’ll say that again. If I am in an energetic of “I just have to get this done” productivity, I don’t make money, no matter how much effort I put behind it.

And I know why that is. When the masculine takes action without consulting the feminine, as it did throughout patriarchy, the result is depletion – of the feminine, of resources, of options. Working without the feminine, or overriding the feminine, breeds more separation, and my business is just not allowed to generate income via productivity and hustle without the mutual energetics of healthy feminine/masculine integration. When the two are working in tandem, healthy energetics regenerate, including money.

If I co-create through devotional practices, I do receive flow in my business, such as new clients and money. Things happen. I don’t have to worry. For example, people book consults out of the blue just when I have space. If I listen to the divine guidance, my life is moving forward in regenerative energetics (something I talked a lot about in 2021 on the Sacred Remembering Podcast and will talk about more again as I teach about prosperity in the Heartland.)

So receptivity is the result of first devotion, then co-creation.

No more acquiring resources through hustle. No more producing just to get paid. No more exchanging energy for perceived value. No more working tirelessly (producing) in order to secure less than what brings me joy. No more “doing” without satisfaction.

The feminine is innately receptive. But “she” needs some sort of partnership with the masculine and this exchange needs to be healthy in order for her to begin to receive in new ways – i.e. without exhausting herself with productivity. We haven’t had healthy exchanges between feminine and masculine as our cultural norms, and so, we are establishing them now in our modern world.

Journal on it:

Where are you in the energetic of hustle or productivity without divine guidance?
What does feminine devotion look like to you?
How are you leading your life according to what you know is best for you instead of responding to what you have to do?
What is your relationship with your inner masculine? Does “he” push you to hustle, or does it respect your flow also? Is it strong and devoted also, or does it lie around lazily or struggle to set structure and follow through? How does your inner masculine support you?

Staying Home to Come Home: Women in the Pandemic

I heard that from many women during quarantine – the realization that what modern life expected of them no longer felt sustainable.

What happened when you stayed home during quarantine? I’ll hear whatever story of change you want to tell, but what I really want to know is what happened on the inside of you?

As I write this, we got the “stay home” order in North Carolina almost exactly three months ago. And, now, even though the cases of Coronavirus are greater than they were three months ago, the “stay home” orders are now increasingly lifted for economic reasons. There is a push for things to go back to normal, and yet, I hope we don’t miss the available lessons.

How did this quarantine and all that it exposed change you? And is it still?

For a little context, I’m the mother of an 11 year old son who lives between two houses, and I’ve worked from home via the internet as a life coach, distance healer, and women’s & relationship coach for over two years. So the format of my work was not affected when this hit, and actually, I was prepared for it because I’d already been through the highs and lows of such deep transition and could now assist others. And, I was able to actually spend more time with my child, which exposed quite a bit.

While I won’t bore you with the small accounts of what happened during quarantine, I will say that all of the things that were not working in our busy day to day life immediately became apparent when we stayed home. Discrepancies in parenting between households and the way our child had grown emotionally avoidant in fifth grade came to the surface to be revealed. We looked at it, and within two weeks, we had a new schedule and a new family therapist. I’m so grateful for that, because it’s made a huge positive impact on our child, and we otherwise would have missed it, had life just kept on.

Then, in April, a baby goat was born on the farm we lived on, and I thought, “Good grief I’m so glad he’s not in school right now.” Because when we heard the mama goat yell out in labor, he was able to run and get to the pen in enough time to watch the baby goat land in the hay. He got to help name it Pixie.

In case I need to spell it out, this was incredibly special. We’d moved out of the city a few months prior, and now, the choice to have done so grew even sweeter. My boy was watching the birth and early rearing of a mammal, learning about the placenta and birth, watching the milk come in and holding Pixie in his arms at 10pm in front of the mama goat’s nose while the farmer worked to prevent mastitis from setting in. My son had a place in things that was different as a result of staying home.

So I became “that mom” when I emailed the school – the school where I was formerly the middle grades principal – and I said, “Now that we know North Carolina isn’t counting grades this year, and my son is building forts while learning about measurement & cooperation, planting gardens, and is deeply engaged in the life of a new baby goat, I’m going to advocate that we all relax with the piles of computer work.” On Earth Day, when there was homework to research something online, I intervened and simply submitted a picture of him and Pixie the goat instead of evidence of a closer relationship with the Earth.

Real life again mattered more than assignments or schedules. And I was witnessing that my child was touching childhood in a way that he would not have if not for this pause. And as I looked around at the women’s groups that I was hosting, each woman was touching life in a new way as well.

We were touching life. Eventually. Because each life went through an adjustment period in quarantine, as you know. Uncomfortable at first, and then, there was more life.

I was facilitating two women’s groups online – one a six-month Mastermind that had begun mid January 2020, and another a group called Choosing Nourishment that came together right at the beginning of quarantine when I noticed that women, even though they were already tired and juggling quite a bit in their lives, jobs, and households, and you may have thought that quarantine would provide reprieve, were actually quite frazzled in their nervous systems as a result of the changes.

“You want me to stay home, work from my computer, and homeschool my kids?”

“You want me to stay in the house with this husband of mine that is unwilling to actively help us figure out our finances?”

“You want me to stay in the house with the man who doesn’t care at all what my opinion is and makes me feel invisible?”

The panic was up. The nervous systems alert. This did not feel like a good idea to stay home. In fact, to some, I noticed that it felt really scary. Like modern life had been some sort of very busy distraction, and even though it wasn’t necessarily working or feeling good, nor particularly fun, it was the norm, and they’d learned how to manage it. This was the same reason I’d left working in schools to start my own business two years ago – modern life just wasn’t sustainable any more.

I heard that from many women during quarantine – the realization that what modern life expected of them no longer felt sustainable.

As time passed, and as we held the space in confidence and safe space in these women’s groups to talk about how to choose the nourishment, how to be in communion with this opportunity to push pause, I noticed that all of the women began to care less about whether or not things like the homeschooling got done, and cared more about feeling good, re-connecting with their families, and listening to their authentic inner voices.

Feeling good matters. Knowing oneself matters. Being able to sit and breathe in a body with a settled nervous system matters. And modern life makes these things “self-care” periphery practices instead of, well, the norm. But in quarantine, more women began to prioritize a rebalancing that they’d previously only dreamed of.

Priorities shifted. Preferences stated more clearly. Boundaries realized.

And then, about six weeks into quarantine, in the Mastermind that is all about the quest for the Sacred Truth within each woman, after months of clearing old stories and identities, a “Coming Home” theme emerged.

And I chuckled as I said, “Hmm, staying home to come home.”

And everywhere I looked to see what women were doing, in these groups and in the collective of women, I kept hearing women say:

“Maybe it doesn’t have to go back to the way it was.”

“That was never sustainable and we knew it all along.”

“I don’t even want to go back to work. I never want to feel like that again.”

“Maybe I won’t send my child back to school next year.” “Maybe it’s time to finally own my skills as a healer.”

“Maybe it’s time to start the business I really want to start.”

It was mandated that we all stay home. Yet, it was rather unsuspected how we discovered that so many women, would, also, come home to themselves. And I love witnessing it. It feels like only a beginning to what has been such a long time coming.

Women remembering who they are.

Women coming home to the truth of who they are.

Women, refusing to live unsustainable lives.

Women, planting gardens and knowing rest for the first time in years.

Women, making plans for what they might create next.

I truly hope that we don’t go back to life as usual, that this actually changed us in the way it had the potential to change us. Because through a wider lens, this is how the feminine rebalances with the masculine, a story I told of my own life in my TEDx from last year. So much happens when women come home to themselves.

Worlds open.

The feminine principle, the archetype – which involves rest and bodies and satisfaction and families first – was touched through this quarantine experience. I’d say it was awakened, in many women.

How did this change you? What are you willing to go back to and unwilling to go back to? What will you do differently?

I chose to integrate family and home life with my partner, moving in together during quarantine. I chose to begin to walk in nature daily, even though I’d lived in nature before and yet failed to prioritize it. I chose to begin organizing a potential home-school cooperative for the fall with the same children that my child was able to play and bond with during the spring.

I’m beginning to dream of new systems of education and women’s entrepreneurial collaboration that before seemed so far off, and now, it feels like the time to choose based on deeper preference and intuitive knowing.

I found myself choosing to relax and read fiction, to sleep in, to start a new yoga practice.

I chose to come further home, and I choose it still.

And I’ll ask you, women, did you come home? And I’ll encourage you. Come home to the truth of who you are. Don’t go back to an unsustainable status quo. If you allowed yourself to dream, what would you create?

If this article speaks to you, let’s work together.